{"id":46,"date":"2012-06-19T00:57:10","date_gmt":"2012-06-19T04:57:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/?p=46"},"modified":"2012-06-19T10:44:21","modified_gmt":"2012-06-19T14:44:21","slug":"33-out-of-39","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/?p=46","title":{"rendered":"33 out of 39"},"content":{"rendered":"

Sounds like a passing test score right? \u00a0I’ve thought way too much about this blog post (read: over thinking is NOT good). \u00a0I considered advice I’d give to a new diabetic, or a letter to my siblings (especially my brother who wasn’t even 2 years old when I was diagnosed) for all the times my “up-keep” took away from theirs.<\/p>\n

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Me & my brother<\/p><\/div>\n

I imagined a post about the incredible changes in diabetes technology that have occurred in “my” time and my hopes for the future. \u00a0Last week, I kept recalling a memory of my high school English research paper on diabetes and how I left out ONE big fact, a book listed the life span of a Type 1 diabetic to be cut by a 1\/3 (I didn’t want my class mates to know that but I cried myself silly). \u00a0I envisioned listing all the absurd comments people have made when they realized I’m diabetic (that’s still on the blog list for another day… yeah I’m coming for you Jet Blue flight attendant). \u00a0But tomorrow is the big day and it’s getting late and here I am. \u00a0So here’s what I got:<\/p>\n

My parents took the doctor’s advice when I was diagnosed (6\/19\/79) as their mantra:<\/p>\n

I was a child first, and a diabetic second<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

That was it. \u00a0Plain and simple. \u00a0So I did everything every other kid did. \u00a0I played sports. \u00a0I played a ton of sports I didn’t even want to play. \u00a0I went to sleepovers. \u00a0I went to sleepovers for kids I didn’t like. \u00a0But I lived. \u00a0I got yelled at for getting a C+ in Spanish. \u00a0I got grounded for mouthing off to my Mom. \u00a0I spent too much time on the phone with my friends. \u00a0I had so many summer jobs that I’m pretty sure my parents broke all US child labor laws. \u00a0I liked boys who had no idea I even existed. \u00a0And I lived.<\/p>\n

I looked at colleges (side note: my Dad took me to visit Harvard first… no, I was not even close to Harvard material), and I made sure those colleges were not near my parent’s home. \u00a0I had roommates who scared me. \u00a0I made friends. \u00a0I studied Architecture. \u00a0I had a fake ID. \u00a0I drank too much. \u00a0I didn’t do a good job checking my blood but I always took my shots. \u00a0I gained 15 lbs my freshman year of college. \u00a0It looked more like 25. \u00a0I switched majors. \u00a0I had boyfriends. \u00a0I never once did drugs. \u00a0I made questionable fashion choices (hey it was the 90s, cut me some slack). \u00a0And I lived.<\/p>\n

I got a job (OK that did NOT happen right away). \u00a0I moved to NYC. \u00a0I got new doctors. I got more serious about my health. \u00a0I embarked on a career. I had a boss who believed in me.\u00a0 Wait, I had a boss who really believed in me.\u00a0 My job took me all over the world. \u00a0I had my eyes lasered more than once. \u00a0I took a heck of a lot of shots. \u00a0I traveled more. \u00a0I pulled the trigger because I<\/strong>\u00a0was finally ready, and I got a pump. \u00a0Pump training took a ton of time. \u00a0My college boyfriend broke my heart. \u00a0I couldn’t eat. \u00a0I got really skinny. I went to therapy to fast forward the healing of my heart. \u00a0Therapy taught me some stuff I hadn’t thought about how I viewed being diabetic. I realized I didn’t like the ex-boyfriend that much. \u00a0 I lived.<\/p>\n

I got back in the saddle. \u00a0I dated most of Manhattan (and some of Brooklyn). \u00a0My career actually took off. \u00a0\u00a0<\/em>I saw a lot more of the world. \u00a0I had crazy adventures. \u00a0I started a JDRF Walk Team (Alecia’s Stem Cells). \u00a0I got a lot of people to walk. \u00a0I hosted team fundraisers. I had big parties to celebrate diabetes anniversaries (Its NYC. \u00a0We eat that stuff up). \u00a0I recruited my friends and family for all sorts of MY stuff. \u00a0I kept designing lamps. \u00a0I started designing jewelry. \u00a0I tied my jewelry business to my JDRF fundraising. \u00a0My work appeared in amazing places. \u00a0I went to amazing places. \u00a0I lived.<\/p>\n

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Our 2010 Alecia’s Stem Cells shirts!<\/p><\/div>\n

I have the same problems other people have. \u00a0I have fears many of my peers have never even considered. \u00a0I worry about the future. \u00a0I am infuriated that stem cell research lags so far behind in this country. \u00a0I frequently curse the FDA. \u00a0I have begun to curse the TSA. \u00a0I worry I will never have kids. \u00a0I worry if I did have kids I won’t be alive to see them grown. I worry I will die in my sleep of hypoglycemic unawareness. \u00a0I worry that all this diabetes stuff is too much for my boyfriend. \u00a0I worry I will need a new kidney. I worry that if I currently pay more for private health insurance than many people’s annual salary, how will this ever possibly turnout well? \u00a0I worry every time I get cut. \u00a0My current big worry is that I will someday be a burden to my siblings. \u00a0My bigger fear is that my future nieces and nephews will be diabetic too and I don’t want my siblings to have that burden. \u00a0I worry I won’t get to see the day of the artificial pancreas being available or I’ll be too sick to get one. \u00a0I worry that I will fall through the healthcare cracks. \u00a0I worry that I worry too much.<\/p>\n

And then I take a minor break from worrying. \u00a0I work-out. \u00a0I get my heart beating. \u00a0I get my heart pounding. \u00a0I think of my circulation and telling my heart to step up to the plate because my pesky pancreas can’t anymore. \u00a0I think of all the parents I’ve met who cry when I speak to them because they consider me an inspiration. \u00a0I think of my sister’s college roommate being diagnosed (T1D) \u00a0while in college and how she felt I was the only one she could ask questions. \u00a0I think of how I fought to get a pump. \u00a0I think of how glad I am to have a Dexcom. \u00a0I think of how I was the longest living diabetic in my JDRF mentoring class. \u00a0I think of turning 40 next year (OK that freaks me out so I immediately STOP thinking of that and then freak out a little more. \u00a040? \u00a0Seriously? I act like I’m 12). \u00a0I think of how much I value my life. \u00a0I think of all the gifts I’ve been given and how truly blessed I am. \u00a0I think of this image below (and I apply it to things far beyond running), oh, and by the way, I live:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sounds like a passing test score right? \u00a0I’ve thought way too much about this blog post (read: over thinking is NOT good). \u00a0I considered advice I’d give to a new diabetic, or a letter to my siblings (especially my brother … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[16,3,4,541,26,11,540,25,5,24],"class_list":["post-46","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-animas","tag-dexcom","tag-diabetes","tag-diaversary","tag-fear","tag-insulin-pump","tag-jdrf","tag-live","tag-t1d","tag-type-1"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2tD0n-K","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=46"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":53,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46\/revisions\/53"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=46"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=46"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.surfacefine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=46"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}