Cleaning? Phewy.

Clean it Out – Wednesday 5/13 
Yesterday we kept stuff in, so today let’s clear stuff out.  What is in your diabetic closet that needs to be cleaned out?  This can be an actual physical belonging, or it can be something you’re mentally or emotionally hanging on to.  Why are you keeping it and why do you need to get rid of it?  (Thank you Rick of RA Diabetes for this topic suggestion.)

Hey, I didn’t keep it “in” yesterday.  I let it out.  I thought a few times after I hit “post’, that if I’m talking about my conflicting feelings that I have too much information out there, I was willingly increasing that “out there-ness” with yesterday’s post.  Any second guessing myself thoughts were erased last night.  I was on my way home when I checked my email. Every note about the post yesterday made me cry.  The notes were beautiful, some heart breaking but all so touching and relatable.  Dammit these eyes are all misty just typing this.

As for things you need to physically toss… oh where do I start?  About a month or so ago I ended up with a sinus infection that knocked me on my derriere for 3 full days.  I wondered if I was actually dying and do people die from sinus/bronchial infections.  I don’t have an answer to that, since I couldn’t keep my head up long enough to do research.  As I slowly lost my mind being trapped in my apartment and peaking around for the grim reaper (and misplacing the TV remote and watching 4 episodes of Keeping Up With The Kardashians… who i learned are tought to keep up with for sure), I started going through my diabetes cabinet.  Please note, this sounds like I’m organized.  Smoke and mirrors my friends (dry ice anyone?).  I have a diabetes cabinet and then Dexcom boxes on shelves, back-up syringes in a closet, old pump supplies on other shelves… you get the picture right?  Oh and I almost forgot there is a secret hiding spot in the wall under my bed.  I refer to that as “the Well”.  I dropped a pair of tweezers in there once and never saw them again.  Scary.

So I started going through the diabetes stuff.  If asked, I would have guessed there were supplies that were expired and probably the earliest date was 2011.  Nope. 2005.  Yes, I have pump supplies that have discolored.  You know why?  Because they are over 10 years old!!!! EXPIRED 10 years ago so I have probably had them for 12 years and they belong to an old pump I would need a training class to ever use again.  Now, you can make a solid argument that I am just messy and that’s the whole pathetic story.  That argument is indeed solid.  Although the demise of my sinuses got me to go through ALL the stuff, I kept some of it.  What?!?!  Hoarder?  Maybe (probably), but when I think of things like the week there was NO electricity in my neighborhood during Superstorm Sandy, or the denial letter for my Dexcom from the insurance company (still not worked out but things seem to be going in my favor), I worry that someday, the most recent “expired” supplies will be useful.  If nothing else, I could form an escape rope out of all the pump tubing right?  I mean I’d need to learn some speed knitting but it could happen, no?

Yep I kept supplies that expired in 2013 (2005-2012 bit the dust). Hopefully I will never have to use the 2013 or 2014 supplies, but there is a weird sense in comfort knowing that they are there, and that’s ok by me.  Maybe I’ll turn them into an art project the next time I’m home sick, because seriously, cleaning is/was the worst.

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