Wordless Wednesday – Riders On The Storm

The story to go with this post is just outrageous, bizarre and absurd, but it’s Wordless (and way stressful) Wednesday.

I think maybe the smile is enough to convey my thoughts (and wet hair blown across face /stuck to my cheek apparently).

20 miles.

Adventure.

Check!

Also, Dexcom in shirt.  Can I be like Sponge Bob Square Pants, but instead Square Boob?

IMG_4713

Wordless Wednesday – PROGRESS!!!

I can’t even describe how inspired I feel today (I’ve been up since 4:30am so it may partially be exhaustion, but I do feel excited).  While my brain and my heart settle a bit… here’s a pic of me last night (microphone not working and video without sound).  I definitely think I was a bit stiff and far away, my chit-chat was the most boring part of the evening, but who cares…. BECAUSE…..

Not a bad pic.  Pretty sure this is when I realized there was no video playing!

Not a bad pic. Pretty sure this is when I realized there was no video playing!

 

THIS IS WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT!

Dr Aaron Kowalski

Dr Aaron Kowalski

Dr. Aaron Kowalski.

MIND.

BLOWN.  

I got to sit next to him and afterward, bombard him with questions.  If my pancreas could smile, believe me, it would have.

Pancreas from I Heart Guts

Pancreas from I Heart Guts

 

 

 

 

More information on all of this later!  And here’s some additional info about Dr. Kowalski:

Dr. Kowalski, JDRF’s Vice President, Artificial Pancreas Project.  He is an internationally recognized expert in the area of diabetes technologies, and oversees JDRF-funded research aimed at accelerating the delivery and development of the artificial pancreas systems. He has authored numerous articles in the field, including co-authoring the landmark study in The New England Journal of Medicine that revealed the effectiveness of continuous glucose monitors in T1D.

Dr. Kowalski’s brother Stephen was diagnosed with type 1 in 1977 diabetes and in 1984, Dr. Kowalski was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

 

New Rates And Some Other Stuff

Endo appointment yesterday.  Didn’t have high hopes (high, ha) as I have been running way TOO high lately, especially overnight.  A1c is a higher than it has been in 3 years.  Disappointing but not surprising (up .3 BUT that takes me to the next whole number and that I seriously dislike).  Also gained a chunk of weight.  More than I thought, but not upsetting as I missed having a butt.  Baby Got Back can’t be my favorite song without some junk in the trunk right?

Adjusted some basal rates with my doctor as the last adjustments did zilch.

New basals worked way TOO well overnight. Ooof.  This morning’s headache plus allergies was like being b*tched slapped by my pump and then a bag of freshly cut grass… over and over again.

20140528-081253.jpg

Also, I found a whole bunch of hearts this morning. And TONS the last few days.  Timing. Found: hearts . I still have a lot to add.  I find myself walking routes where I know I will see hearts that I’ve already met.  If nothing else, it’s a good breathing exercise.  See a heart, take a HUGE deep breath.

According to FitBit, I’m averaging just shy of 40 miles a week.  How the H-E-double-hockey-sticks is that possible?!?  Amazing.  That’s all walking!  Cray.

There appears to be another shot (shots, ha) at my getting into an artificial pancreas trial.  I don’t want to think too much about it and set myself up for disappointment but the idea of this old body being used for diabetes progress is deliriously exciting.  Stop thinking about it.  Easier to say than do.

My 35th diaversary is approaching next month.  My feelings on this are a tangled web.  I should write about that, as maybe I’m not the only one?  35 years of this fear and giving myself incessant mental pep talks is a really long time.

In other news, my eye is FINALLY healing (and an allergy puff ball).

eyeheal

This past Saturday, I said goodbye to two of the very biggest Alecia’s Stem Cells supporters.  They were with me from the very beginning of founding ASC.  Saturday would have been their 60th wedding anniversary.  Now they are back together.  Also, being on a moving dock with ashes is a possible recipe for disaster.  Life is short.  Never lose sight of the wonderful experiences you’ve had along the way.  The people who believe in you… hug them, love them, appreciate them.  Sappy-McSappster moment.

GBK

A few other random thoughts and observations:  50 Cent should stick to rap, I need to try pump sites in my lower back, Maya Angelou was one hell of a woman, and I may have seen Apollo Creed at a train station in Jersey on memorial day.

apollo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wordless Wednesday… But…. errrr Butt.

This is NOT the face of diabetes, but rather the butt.

The butt on the beach.

The butt under an umbrella.

diaface

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The butt (and the rest of me) being VERY fortunate on a spur of the moment weekend getaway.

There is also a thigh of diabetes with a Dexcom G4 sensor on it.

The sensor had 3 heart rhinestone stickers to jazz it up.

The thigh of diabetes was too busy getting some sun to pose for pics.

 

The Love Train, Passion & Charo

Real quick…. Don’t have much time for blogging these days so here are a few food-for-thought-esque items:

1. I “followed” a woman around CVS to get a photo of her dog.  I thought the dog looked like Charo when I saw it on the street.  Yes, I then turned around and chased them through a store.  Cuchi, cuchi. I love this dog (the dog’s real name is Blanche).

charoJPG

 

2.  Someone once gave me the advice of taking a photo of your pump’s basal settings.  This is REALLY good advice.  When things go wrong, this is REALLY important stuff.  Do it.  Now.  I will wait.  Go.  Trust me.

basals

 

3.  I saw this sign last night on the subway.

diabetes subway

When the gal sitting in front of the sign got out at Grand Central Station, I took the fastest photo ever (everyone was walking into me at the same time… human bumper cars).  I have issues with this sign.  I DO want a healthier NYC.  I also have a huge desire to eradicate the belief that I had too much sugar as a kid and developed T1D.  I also would like it noted I never had orange soda. This will be it’s own blog post someday (the sign, not some lack of orange soda).  Which leads me to a post I think is effing brilliant (and if you missed this, do yourself a favor & absorb this one) from over at Sweetly Voiced.  If you are still reading my gibberish and skipped over the link in the last sentence, go back and click on it.  Worth it.

4.  This is what my Dexcom looked like this morning.

90

Pretty sweet.  My Low alarm is set at 90.  90 and steady is awesome.  You know what’s not so awesome? The alarm going off over and over at a 90 bg when you just want a few more minutes of sleep.  The alternative is to be 90 and dropping and not feeling it and never waking up again, so I guess that pesky alarm will just have to remain. Ahhh 90… you torture me with your goodness.

5.  This morning I saw this on a subway sign:

l train

 

Look closely at the “L”.  there’s a heart!  The L train is the LOVE train?  Say what?  Good stuff people.

6.  I read this earlier today after all the 90 bg alarming business.   I’m sure there’s a way to tie this into diabetes stuff but I’ll leave that one up to you (I gotta go).  I think it’s terrific.  Happy Wednesday.

“I began to realize how important it was to be an enthusiast in life. He taught me that if you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go at it at full speed ahead. Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and above all become passionate about it. Lukewarm is no good. Hot is no good either. White hot and passionate is the only thing to be.”

Roald Dahl (1916-1990); British novelist

Wordless Wednesday? Whatever.

Yesterday was not a great diabetes day.  I still don’t feel like writing about my doctor’s appointment.

I thought I was off to a great, fresh start at the gym this morning.  Then I got to work and split my pleather riding pants.  Who doesn’t love grunge (or odd skin exposure at work)?

I think we all need more silly moments.  Well, I would really like more silly moments.  Yesterday I snapped the photo below.  It makes me smile.  J Crew Baby looks like some baby had a level 10 temper-tantrum in the window display.  Silly. jcrewbaby

 

I imagine a baby screaming, “NO I DON’T LIKE THAT SWEATER” or “GET ME OUT OF THIS STORE” or ” I HATE THE UPPER EAST SIDE AND THESE PREPPY CLOTHES, MOM”.

I didn’t get much sleep last night.

Smile.  Happy Wednesday.

Don’t Fall For Pretty

If you are going to bed, and see this:

 

Note the time.  Started treating 5 minutes before this photo.

Note the time.  Started treating 5 minutes before this photo.

DO NOT TREAT WITH THIS:

g2

 

Why?

Because apparently my NEW emergency juice is low calorie which means = LOW CARBOHYDRATE.

And then THIS will happen:

NOTE the time.

NOTE the time.

At almost 11:35 pm, after BGs hovering between 49 and 54 for a FULL 30 minutes and feeling my heart racing, tears welling in my eyes over and over as my brain short circuited, (but oddly not sweating), panic creeping further and further into my body, I looked at the Gatorade label.  5 grams of carb per serving.  Like drinking air.

Who knew Gatorade made such a low carb drink?  As a non-Gatorade drinker, I picked the WRONG emergency juice to have at home, but the purple had looked so pretty.

Learn from my mistakes people.

 

 

Love Spies

As a New Yorker, as an American and simply just as a human being, 9/11 is wrought with emotion, deep sadness and many memories.  I have stories I could tell, my fellow Alecia’s Stem Cells teammates have many, many stories too, some of survival, some of hope and kindness, but quite a few of unbelievable horror and grief.

I can’t possibly do justice to any of these stories today and planned to post some Wordless Wednesday photos I’ve taken over the years of the Twin Towers, the blue lights that symbolized the towers from past 9/11 memorials, construction photos of One World Trade Center, and the 9/11 memorial pools.

911 pools

 

If you follow me on Twitter or Instagram (especially Instagram), you know over the course of the summer, I became keenly aware of “hearts” in my world.  On the sidewalk, in graffiti, a crumpled piece of paper in the street, gum on the curb.  Frequently, I see a “heart” somewhere.  Depending on what’s going on in my world, they symbolize different things to me.  I usually see them when I’m alone and they always make me think (or change my thinking), and usually stop me in my tracks (well I’m not taking action photos, so I do actually need to stop).  I try to change my walk routes now, in the hopes of finding an undiscovered heart.  Often these hearts give me hope.

love 3

This morning I passed 2 familiar hearts on my way to work.  Hearts I now see all the time.  I was secretly hoping I would see a NEW heart today but it didn’t happen.  The 9/11 TV coverage I’d watched as I walked out the door weighed heavy on my heart.  I thought of the friend I was with on 9/11, who has since passed away, and how very much I miss him.

At the office, my BG skyrocketed, work stress elevated (like crazy yo), I very politely but firmly argued with a medical supplier and I glanced out my window.  I have pigeons that land on my windowsill often.  I call them Pigeon Spies.  I claim they are stealing my designs and that they are annoying, but secretly, I love them (even though they occasionally give me a heart attack when they tap the window as they land).  They taunt my dog and fall asleep inches from him.  They are bold, brave and curious.  Those pigeons are New Yorkers.

Every once in awhile, two pigeons will be on the sill at the same time.  One is always going after the other and there are never two on the sill for more than a few seconds.  Today, I watched something new.  Two pigeons.  One much bigger than the other one.  They stood together, side by side.  They watched me for awhile and mirrored my movements (yep, spies) and then they turned and sat down, touching, looking out on a corner of New York City.  The smaller one leaned over and the big one got down a little lower.  There’s a term for this, allogrooming, meaning grooming performed by one animal upon another animal of the same species.  Perhaps we all see what we want to see, but the smaller pigeon spent so much time fixing the other pigeon’s head feathers, it was remarkable.  I was less than 6 inches away, they would look at me, but they didn’t leave.  There was something tender about it.  I felt exactly like when I see hearts.  It felt like love.

pigeon love

So today, just remember to love.  On some level, we are all in this together.  Whether it’s helping someone in the DOC, or reaching out to a friend or a family member.  Just remember to love.

Thanks for bringing me some magic today, Pigeon Spies.  Tomorrow you can go back to taunting and stealing.